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Posted: Yesterday at 01:31 pm
A familiar pain filled her chest as she gazed at the androgynous woman in front of her. Usagi didn't react, but her eyes shone if she felt rejected and unsure of herself. Haruka was the first person she got this close to... Does she even like me? Excitement and fear were mixing inside of her.
Usagi exploited Haruka's words as pretext to ease up a little. The gender fluid blond was saying things like 'slow down' and 'we'll see what happens'. The bun head was starting to think that maybe.....Haruka wasn't interested in her like that after all? Who could blame her. Usagi was a short, chubby, greedy, crybaby, and a terrible heroine to top it all off.
Maybe... I'm not good enough
What was that feeling? Usagi could feel her heart racing in her chest. She felt nostalgic joy and pain mixing inside her. What about last night, she was thinking. Was Haruka just playing with her emotions? It was a good chance that she was and poor Usagi didn't notice it.
When Haruka said she had never kissed someone before, Usagi's little heart skipped a beat. Did that mean maybe she did have a chance? She wasn't adverse to trying, and with her friends at her side, she might even have a better chance! Overall, Haruka's mixed signals made her feel mixed emotions. 'You know what? You're right!' Exclaimed Usagi as she fought back tears. She jumped up, grabbing Haruka's hands. 'I should go check in with my family... papa would be really mad if I didn't. I don't want to worry anyone.' She was talking really fast and hyper, trying to get all the words out in her chipper mood before she let the tears fall.
'And I'm reaaaaaally hungry too. I bet mama's making a traditional Japanese breakfast... cause eggs and milk are hard to come by these days.' The decision to leave was hard for Usagi. One thing for sure, she was incredibly enjoying her time with Haruka and the urge to flirt with her was too tempting. But she had to read into the signs too.
It was hard to explain the events that took place in the last day. Usagi alone at night and Haruka coming to her rescue, taking her home, and sleeping with her. Something inside Usagi faded. Her heart, which was at a good pace a few minutes ago, gradually slowed down. With just a thud every other second, Usagi thought she would faint from humiliation.
'I guess... I should change and make it for breakfast then.' Slowly she withdrew herself. Tears stung her eyes but she hardly noticed over the feeling of her heart frozen in her chest.
With a sad smile and a faint sigh, she walked away from the kitchen area and hurried to the bathroom where she changed at a speed so fast she may have out sped Haruka. She came out wearing a light pink ensemble and her hair back in their usual buns and pigtails.
For her, if ever she was right about her feelings, whatever they had or didn't have for each other was somehow... forbidden?
It just wasn't right.
'Arigato, Haru chan. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have made it out the storm last night.' Usagi said with a worried smile. She didn't want to look into her beautiful deep blue eyes. 'I hope... we can see each other again soon...if you wanted to.'
Usagi wanted to purposely distance herself from Haruka. Maybe a hot meal would help her understand her feelings. But something about their union was off.
She stood in the doorway with a huge grin on her face, waving. She wanted Haruka not to think anything of her sudden exit. And she fled away. Running as fast as she could up the stairs to the Tsukino home. When she got inside, she slammed the door and started to sob loudly.
Ikuko-mama came around the corner with a frying pan in one hand. 'Usagi? What happened?' But her daughter didn't reply, she just closed her eyes and let the tears flow.
Maybe not today. But one day... she would impress Haruka Tenou.
fight for yourself
don’t throw away destiny for a prince
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